Grains. Missiles. Text. Images.
Well her eyes might not shine but...
Author: mr.mhhs
...at least she's all mine.
That's right all you technodorks with your nintendo DS systems and Xboxes and shit, eat your rotten little hearts out. This here's a genuine fuckin Atari 2600 "video computer system."
Instead of playing with a fake dog or flirting with sim-animals, I dilligently protect the world from communist warheads in "Missile Command." Sure the missiles all look alike, sure the Atari version of nuclear war is no more disturbing than a fart; it's a well put together game that gets better with age. Can YOU beat my score of 25,130? I didn't think so.
Likewise with "Pitfall" the classic platform action series dedicated to helping the great white explorer find riches in the jungle. Strangely, he never runs into any people who actually live there... Frustrating, primitive, but completely addictive. I cannot stop playing this game whenever my housemates aren't watching postfeminist dramas or Dr. shows.
My point is this dudes: the Atari is a lost treasure. And now i have one (thanks christopher, for this most generous birthday gift). Which means now, come to think of it, i have treasure. I know all of you will be lining up to be playing it with me soon. Just make sure to check your new stuff at the door and then we'll all have a grand ole time.
my feelings can best be summed up with the title of a gin blossoms song: "jealousy"
Chopper Command, dude. Chopper Command.
While your nostalgia for your Atari video computer system is endearing M (although not nearly as endearing as those photos you posted earlier in the day, surely to distract us readers from your specious argument - your nephew's little food-crusted mouth? adorable!) - have you learned nothing from our contemporary political climate? Recall the lessons learned from _Team America: World Police_ - did it teach you nothing?
Sure you think I'm flirting with sim-animals on my DS, but that seemingly innocuous flirting is actually me - armed with a gas mask and a halo - defending America not from the fustian, unitary, and easily discernible enemy during the cold war climate of the early 1980s, but combatting insurgents who come at me in various forms (be they adorable onesie-wearing lions, curmudgeonly wolves, or sickeningly sweet bunnies). Terror is everywhere - and it is not as obvious as a missile - it is behind every pear or cherry that I harvest, every fish that I catch, and every seashell that I pick up on the beach to sell to Tom Nook, the plucky raccoon merchant.
In other words - there has been a paradigm shift and your Atari and its precious "Missile Command" are hopelessly behind. Danger is no longer as easily detectable as a communist warhead and is no longer preventable by the actions of a single (must I say it? white, male, privileged and yet always absent) individual. Keep living in your bubble dude... but don't come running to me when you need me to pull out my axe and break Vesta the Sheep's door down because she sent you a letter laced with anthrax.
nice!
but tell me, "nook the raccoon" ISN'T the racist invention of a white subject position? puh- lease.